Friday, April 29, 2011

Loki’s Hot Tub Party Machine

My lovely wife neglected to mention our newest addition to outdoor hosting. It has proven fantastic through the winter months and we are both amped up to start using it this summer. We were able to get a great deal at the end of last summer on a brand new Tropic Seas 7 seat hot tub. It took a bit more work to get set up than we had expected, but after having a qualified electrician come out and run a 220 amp outlet to our back yard, we were able to power up.

There are ten rules for hot tubing in Loki’s Backyard

10. My tub, my tunes.
9. Frozen hair feels funny.
8. Always bring a cooler; the wife gets angry if you track water from the door to the fridge every time you run dry.
7. Even hot tub water freezes after it sits on the patio long enough, and stamped concrete hurts when you fall.
6. Loki likes the taste of the water, but does not want to go in the water.
5. Alcohol is magnified ten times over, if you want to play hooky and bring a bottle of bourbon, it is not smart to try and finish it before the wife gets home from work.
4. Seven man hot tubs do not hold seven men, especially if they are my size. It gets way to friendly.
3. Drunk is not an excuse for a wardrobe malfunction, because so far it has only been dude malfunctions.
2. No peeing in the hot tub!
1. Don’t ask what goes on in the hot tub after hours, if you aren’t careful I might tell ya.

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